The Fine Print

by Eva Pasco, author of "Underlying Notes"

What’s black and white and read all over?  During the Sixties, you’d be hard-pressed to come up with any answer other than the “newspaper” even though the Baby Boomer decade witnessed the decline of newspapers accompanying the rise in television journalism. Now, the World Wide Web and our demand for faster and more flexible transmission of news have blurred our vision where fine print is concerned. One wonders with the cost effectiveness of digital vs. offset printing, how much time it will take before we can no longer see the fine print of The New York Times should it ever become an endangered species

An adolescent growing up during the Sixties, my eyes roved the finely printed The Evening Bulletin and The Providence Sunday Journal delivered to our tubular box by a number of "paper boys" on bicycle who lived in the neighborhood. Nothing like the aroma of a fresh newspaper whose written expression transferred plenty of ink on your hands to leave impressive finger prints on any surface you touched. The first page I turned to hosted the syndicated advice column written by Ann Landers where one person’s anguish became my mirth as I ingested Ann’s no nonsense, common sense solutions. I’d then turn my attention to the Comics, selective in my perusal of Blondie, Peanuts, The Family Circus, and Rex Morgan, MD—a soap that dragged like a snail from day to day. The Arts & Entertainment section offered a spread of liberally licentious triple X ads for pornographic flicks shown at the movie theaters and drive-ins—a passing fancy of mine.

A strong proponent of the printed word, newspapers offer so much more than a device for film noire gumshoes to hide behind while clandestinely stalking their prey. Without mincing words, newspapers have many uses after they’ve been read all over. Who can forget those triangular hats made from recycled newsprint? Merely folding a newspaper page in half width-wise, creasing the sides in towards the middle to form a triangular shape, taking each of the flaps on the bottom and bringing each one up to form an upward flap on each side, a little gluing, and voila! George Washington crossing the Delaware or Napolean Bonaparte at your service.

Recycled newspapers are great for wrapping gifts, deodorizing food containers, packing delicate items, wiping away streaks on glass windows, and garden composting. As newspaper doesn’t burn well when rolled or folded into thick layers, my dad taught my sister and me to "roll our own" nuggets to feed the roaring inferno inside our pot belly stove in the basement. Allow me to "wrap" this story with pearls of wisdom uttered by Ann Landers in fine print: "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."

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